An Inconvienient Truth

Here is a real, true-life adventure with a paying customer:

An elderly man, completing his credit card concession purchase, expresses a concern with my Stand person who just waited on him:

ELDERLY MAN: "Why do I have to sign a receipt? It's dumb."

EMPLOYEE: "It shows you made the purchase, that's all."

ELDERLY MAN: "Do you know how much paper this wastes? Trees, entire forests are used to print a receipt that I throw away."

EMPLOYEE: "I'm sorry. Here's your copy. Have a good time at your movie."

ELDERLY MAN: "I want you to tell that to your boss. NO MORE RECEIPTS."

EMPLOYEE: "Uh, my boss is right here if you would like to talk to him."

ELDERLY MAN: "Yes, I would."

ME: [having heard everything, mentally firing Employee] "How may I help you today?"

ELDERLY MAN: "These credit card receipts! They waste so much paper!" [waves four inch receipt in front of me]

ME: "Yes, sir. They do use paper, but not much."

ELDERLY MAN: "Trees are cut just so I can do this." [makes a production about crumpling the receipt and tossing it in garbage can.] "Why? It is such a waste; a horrendous waste."

ME: "I understand. It is a necessary evil of business I'm afraid."

ELDERLY MAN: "No they're not."

I am a firm believer in fully dealing with a problem or concern when presented with it, and that includes, occasionally having to educate & inform the customer.

ME: "At least two or three times a week I have a past customer phone their credit card company saying they didn't make this purchase. The credit card company sends me a letter and says they are going to take the money from me and give it back to the customer unless I can prove the sale was made. I make a copy of your signed receipt and mail it back to the credit card company so I can keep the money for the purchase that was made. You might choose to throw yours away, but I view it as a necessary evil for transaction's purporses."

ELDERLY MAN: "We are killing trees for this crap. There should be no receipts at all!!"

ME: "If you feel that strongly about this sir, please feel free to contact my Home Office." [provides address] "Otherwise, if I may offer a suggestion? Why don't you simply conduct all your transactions in cash? Unlike at most businesses, cash transactions at either my Box Office or Concession Stand do not generate receipts, whereas credit card purchases do. This would enable you to help save paper and trees."

[Pause.]

[Pause.]

ELDERLY MAN: "You've got a real smart mouth on you."

ME: "I'm sorry you feel that way. I was trying to offer a solution..."

ELDERLY MAN: "Shut up, Smart Mouth. Gimme a water. I'm late for my movie."

ME: [letting his comment roll off my back like water on a duck, reaches for a bottled water, which we sell.]

ELDERLY MAN: "NO, NOT ONE OF THOSE! I'M NOT PAYING YOUR HIGHWAY ROBBERY PRICES! GIVE ME A FREE CUP OF WATER!"

ME: "Sir, there is a drinking fountain just over..."

ELDERLY MAN: "GIVE ME A CUP, SMART MOUTH!"

ME: "Sir? You want to drink from a small plastic cup that you will throw away instead of sipping water at the fountain?"

ELDERLY MAN: "I am NOT lapping at puddle of water like a stray dog. Gimme the cup already!"


Moral of this Story: plastic cups are not a resource worth saving & do not impact our environment when disposed of properly. However, paper is and does. Oh, and old people need real issues to focus on, in addition to heavy sedation.

FIN.